How to leave a bad marriage/relationship according to Salma Keir:
- Get a lawyer.
- Get an apartment.
- Get a job around the children’s needs to succeed.
- Never allow him/her to scream at you on the phone. You are not together anymore. He/she should not have been doing it in the first place.
- Insult you. See above!
- Intimidate you. See above!
- Do not care what he/she thinks of you. Damaging!
- When he/she sends you to alcohol and drug testing, never bad mouth them. Talk about yourself.
- Tell the truth.
- Never be bitter about what happened. Move forward!
- If you leave allow the person left some anger but not towards you.
- Be fair.
- Be kind when possible.
- Be firm without being cruel.
- You have a right once in a while to lose your temper too.
- Become independent of that partner emotionally and financially.
- Start over. Clean the slate.
- Leave it behind. You could not convince them for years, why start now.
- Unroll that burden off your shoulders and leave it where it can be lost.
- Make sure there is a loaf of bread and a jar of peanut butter in the house all the time.
- Take care of your children’s needs yourself without bowing down to anyone else who thinks otherwise.
- Make a new life for your daughters.
- Make sure they are safe and know that you loves them.
- Never speak ill of your estranged partner for the children’s sake not your partner’s.
- Teach them integrity and self-reliance.
- Treat them fairly and firmly with love.
Salma Keir in Caring For Eleanor


The fear of doing the wrong thing is always in the back of the mind of a believer. If I do this, what are the consequences of that! It keeps us in knots thinking that we should remain in bad situations set by archaic ideas and beliefs.
This is the first of two parts of Chicken Negressco from Salma Keir from Caring For Eleanor.