Dear Baba Rumcake,
My boyfriend currently is bad with money. IF we get married he wants me to handle finances. How can I expect that he’ll be okay with me handling finances if he is a big impulse spender? Won’t he get frustrated that he can’t impulse spend when I handle money? Wouldn’t he just do it anyway and cause fights?
I just can’t see him giving up control of his money when he likes to spend it so much. Anyone with good advice on this?
Confused in Des Moines
Dear Confused,
Don’t marry the schlep! Life will be easier, but you will not listen to that. So, here it is.
You are probably correct on most of the points you have listed. But, remember, just because he does impulse spend, does not mean that that is the right thing to do. He is not a child. He needs to learn self control just like any toddler who is not allowed to have everything he wants.
But, that is his part of the deal. You can discuss that seriously before you get married. Self control is his part of the contract.
As for the practical issues:
1- Have two separate bank accounts. All the money goes into your account and you dole out pocket money, to him. Make sure that it is generous, depending on your income level.
2- Agree ahead of time that any large expenditures are to be discussed and agreed upon before purchase.
3- Make sure your names are on both accounts in the event of an emergency; if you can’t trust him not to touch it – RUN.
God bless on your future plans of marriage. Let me know how you do.
Baba Rumcake