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Lonely Condom Seeks Valentine

February 13, 2012 by · 9 Comments
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Valentine’s Day with National Condom Week Is it any surprise that today is not only Valentine’s Day but also National Condom Week? Not to me. I can see the correlation here. Honestly, can’t you see it? Here we are embarking on another V-day where expectations are high and demand is even higher. So, she is [...]

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Irresponsible Dad Problem Not Lazy Son

April 18, 2011 by · Leave a Comment

I have been married for many years, and my husband and I live together. His unemployed and (otherwise homeless) adult son lives with us as well. We have 3 young children from our marriage together. His son does not respect ANY of the rules of the house, doesn’t do any chores, doesn’t contribute anything positive [...]

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Inappropriate Behavior Elicits Enthusiasm

March 28, 2011 by · 1 Comment

Dear Baba Rumcake, They announce your presence to everyone in the room. They say I JUST DROPPED ASS AND YOU’RE ABOUT TO GET HIT IN THE GRILL WITH IT. I will never tire of farting loudly and simultaneously striking any sort of amateur karate stance. However, I’ve recently changed my eating habits and managed to [...]

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True Confessions Can Be Destructive

March 15, 2011 by · Leave a Comment
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True Confessions Day Please don’t be stupid and go confessing something that would cause trouble in your marriage or relationships in general. Just because today is True Confessions Day does not mean you should go into work and tell your Boss that you hate them, no matter how much you want to do it. Just [...]

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Marriage Vows Not Always “Till Do Us Part”

February 20, 2011 by · Leave a Comment

Dear Baba Rumcake, When does it stop hurting? Recently separated from my husband and I know he’s not good for me. (Basically our whole marriage was a fraud for my money) I know that in my head, but my heart still hurts so much. How do you get over a man that you promised in [...]

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Free To Be Creepy

February 18, 2011 by · 1 Comment
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Itchy, Bitchy, Crampy, Moody, Weepy, you get the idea. Which one are you? At birth we are 90% body water. In adulthood it decreases to 70-75%. When we age we dry up like prunes and we are at an ever low of 50%. Why am I sharing this with you? Because today is Perigean Spring [...]

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Gay, Past Life; Are You Serious?

February 9, 2011 by · Leave a Comment

Dear Baba Rumcake, I love my wife and children but occasionally, I like to be with men. Does that mean I was gay in a past life? Tantalized from Cleveland Dear Tantalized, No, I would say, no. You were not gay, in a past life. You are gay, in this life. Are you kidding, pal? [...]

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Do You Have a Significant Jerk?

February 6, 2011 by · Leave a Comment

23 Reasons Why You Might Have a Significant Jerk Below are reasons to dump the jerk in your life. It could be a man or a woman. Don’t be sexist. Just because, it is a jerk, does not mean, just men, it could be a jerk woman; i.e. BITCH. If they do any or a [...]

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The Big D, File or Not File?

February 5, 2011 by · Leave a Comment

Dear Baba Rumcake, Moved out a year ago. I am paralyzed in trying to make a decision to file. I can’t even use the word. What do I do? Indecisive in Independence Dear Indecisive, If you moved out of the schmuck’s house, I assume, he is not worth keeping. You made the first move now [...]

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Alone should not mean lonely!

February 4, 2011 by · Leave a Comment

Dear Baba Rumcake, Hi! How does one get past the lonely feelings? Divorced Dan in Durham Dear Divorced, You can be alone, but not lonely.You need to learn to be by yourself. Your question implies that you have not learned to be by yourself, for any length of time. Learning to be alone is an [...]

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