How To Start An Interesting Sentence

Wordy Wednesday

Sentence starters are always a predicament. Nothing makes for boring reading as tedious, repetitive phrases and word constructions without thought to the possibilities the English language presents.

Here are some sentence beginnings that might alleviate some of the colorless repetitions experienced during novel, short story or any writings. Hoping that these come in handy and useful, I offer them with humble admission that it is my worst weakness.

  • At length the lights were seen….
  • At length he consented….
  • On their way out…..
  • On their way the man……
  • The argument was interrupted when; by……
  • This was a tender point to ……
  • When he/she concluded his/her speech…..
  • Thankfully accepting the offer…..
  • The dispute was at length settled….
  • In these regions…..
  • Her heart was full and she wept….
  • At length she took leave….
  • The aspect of the country soon changed…..
  • The latter accepted the offer – with pleasure; readily;
  • In about two hours…..

Awkward Moments Make Hilarity

Awkward Moments Day

Orange tree fall

I asked people to send me their most awkward moments and here is a list of what I received. Enjoy!

An employee was washing his hands at the sink and the water sputtered and splashed the front of his pants. He looked like he either peed his pants or something else. Was not sure what to do to get out of the bathroom. Tried to blow dry it with the hands blower, when a colleague walked in and saw him in that stance with his crotch up against the warm air. He ran out of there. [Read more…]

Inappropriate Behavior Elicits Enthusiasm

Dear Baba Rumcake,
They announce your presence to everyone in the room. They say I JUST DROPPED ASS AND YOU’RE ABOUT TO GET HIT IN THE GRILL WITH IT. I will never tire of farting loudly and simultaneously striking any sort of amateur karate stance.

However, I’ve recently changed my eating habits and managed to reduce my considerable ass girthiness. I’ve also taken to eating lots of fiber: fruits and Metamucil and what not. Fiber, as you know, will make you fart your fucking brains out. I have also discovered that the majority of these fiber farts are silent in nature. You push them out and it’s all psssssssssss. No thunderclap. No presence.

Any seasoned farter knows fart sounds can be manipulated. You can make a fart loud by sitting on a wooden bench or whatever. And that’s always fun. I always figured farting loudly and boldly was more fun than passing off an SBD. But this recent run of silent farts has been MAGICAL. There’s nothing quite like letting out a soundless fart and then WAITING for everyone else to smell it. You know it’s gonna smell. You know what you just fucking ate. You know it’s only a matter of time before the shock and revulsion hits everyone in the room. I can’t even hide it all that well any more. I just start giggling like a madman about to nuke a city. Then my wife will look over.
Noisy Farter

I have nothing to say to that! Just sharing people’s disgusting behaviors and the nerve they have for sharing. :)
Your life is pathetic. So pathetic in fact, that you actually came up with THREE paragraphs on this subject, typed it up, hit preview; then still decided to submit it!

Baba Rumcake

William Blake on the voice of God

“The Prophets Isaiah and Ezekiel dined with me, and I asked them how they dared so roundly to assert, that God spoke to them; and whether they did not think at the time, that they would be misunderstood, & so be the cause of imposition.

Isaiah answer’d, I saw no God, nor heard any, in a finite organical perception; but my senses discover’d the infinite in every thing, and as I was then persuaded, & remain confirm’d; that the voice of honest indignation is the voice of God, I cared not for consequences but wrote.”
— William Blake (The Marriage of Heaven and Hell: A Facsimile in Full Color)

When someone tells me that they have heard God telling them to do this or that, my logic board kicks into gear. But, more importantly my discernment honed and sharpened over the years of worship and prayer sticks its head out and gently whispers in my heart.

Never do I discount the person who tells me that they have heard God. But, if it is truly God, then the results will be honorable and holy. If Ezekiel and Isaiah screamed in the deserts and nothing happened of what they proclaimed, then they were frauds. But, truth will come and set you free.

If someone claims that they have heard God for me, on my account, then I listen even closer. I take it with a respectful thank you and appreciate it, yet in the dark of my closet, between me and my Maker, I lay it before Him. I need to know if that is truly for me or not. Also, if it is Him or not. The Holy Spirit will let me know the truth or the fantasy of it.

Results are not instant. But, time will tell and those who offer God’s word so freely should beware of using His name to do Satan’s bidding.

When God directs, it is a shame to ask others what they think. When it burns in your heart, speak it out. Like Isaiah and Ezekiel of old who were not running for office and did not care if they were popular or not.

Technology Speeding Ahead of Morality in Action

Technology technology! Oh the delights of technology. Use coal. No coal pollutes. Shut the mines down. Use wood. No, we are killing the trees. Logging industry dead as a doornail. Use oil. No, we depend on the Arabs. How about building some nuclear plants. Go on! I dare ya!

I am just kidding! It amazes me that a nuclear plant’s cooling pumps are powered by the electricity generated from the power plant itself. Battery backup set at the whopping time of eight hours. Failure mode for diesel generator is 24 hours. And there is the recipe for disaster.

Who are these people who design such moronic entities?

How about the one in Diablo Canyon. Same problems. Also intelligently built on a fault line. I am not a scientist God forbid! But, even my pea brain like me cannot fathom the stupidity behind such design.

It’s a good thing these people were not and are not yet responsible for creation. Was the land cheaper? Did this cost less to someone? Did they make more money doing it this ridiculous way? Are all the people in Japan and possibly here in the States just collateral damage which makes it cheaper in the long run?

Who knows! Whatever the reason, it sounds ludicrous and ignorant.