Irresponsible Dad Problem Not Lazy Son

I have been married for many years, and my husband and I live together. His unemployed and (otherwise homeless) adult son lives with us as well. We have 3 young children from our marriage together. His son does not respect ANY of the rules of the house, doesn’t do any chores, doesn’t contribute anything positive at all. He lies. Disrupts the household. Yells at me and the kids.

How do I tell my husband me and the kids or his son?
Living In Turmoil

Dear Living In Turmoil,

Are you frikking kidding me! Why would you even want to stay with that moron who did such a lousy job with his first son? He will do the same for the other three and they will all end up at your doorstep, all homeless and needy.

If you do not see that this situation is on the whole bad for all of you, I am not sure that you hold a job that needs any intelligence. What in the world are you waiting for? An act of Congress to get your butt out of there and protect your children from this lazy, no good, user? Well, you will wait a long time since they don’t have their act together either.

Get off your scared lazy behind and take those children out of there before more harm is caused by the irresponsible behavior of the father. NOT the son, the DAD is the problem. His loose ideals will ruin all of them.
Blessings on your Oh so lame excuses,
-Baba Rumcake

List Why You Chose Your Partner

When things get tough in your relationship, remember all the things you loved about your partner.

Lists, are one of the most important projects you will accomplish in your life. They keep you focused and on task. Use it, to list why you fell in love, why that person was the one. Remember to add to the list the reasons you were convinced that they would make the perfect mate. Remember how they made you feel, good, elated or special. Any number of safe and solid reasons you decided on that choice. [Read more...]

True Confessions Can Be Destructive

Tree in summerTrue Confessions Day

Please don’t be stupid and go confessing something that would cause trouble in your marriage or relationships in general. Just because today is True Confessions Day does not mean you should go into work and tell your Boss that you hate them, no matter how much you want to do it.

Just because today claims to be that day does not mean you have to tell your sister that if she was not family, you would never have thought of knowing her. It is not only creepy, it is rude and unnecessary.

Do not go and tell your spouse that you have been having an affair with her best friend. Who cares you silly sod. Keep it to yourself and do not ruin her life and her relationships. [Read more...]

Why Men Seek Youth

I saw this and thought i should post for women to see.
Free advice from Baba Rumcake that explains how some men are scumbags.

Bad News and the Good News…
Sorry if this is harsh but its good (life changing) advice.
The bad news is you are right. I am 32 and am not interested in girls my own age anymore. [Read more...]

Once Adultery Always A Cheat

Dear Baba Rumcake,
I have been married for 7 years but I have been having an affair for the past year and he wants me to start leaving my marriage to be with him.
My hubby is good to me and I really like them both. In some ways each one of them stands out. we have no kids and I don’t know what I should do. Difficult to decide, my husband is about the same age as me 31 and he is a bit older 40.
Any Ideas?

Hard To Say from Hawthorn [Read more...]

Marriage Vows Not Always “Till Do Us Part”

Dear Baba Rumcake,
When does it stop hurting?
Recently separated from my husband and I know he’s not good for me. (Basically our whole marriage was a fraud for my money) I know that in my head, but my heart still hurts so much.
How do you get over a man that you promised in front of your family and God that you would love forever?

Hardly Over It in O’Brien [Read more...]

Gay, Past Life; Are You Serious?

Dear Baba Rumcake,
I love my wife and children but occasionally, I like to be with men. Does that mean I was gay in a past life?

Tantalized from Cleveland

Dear Tantalized,

No, I would say, no. You were not gay, in a past life. You are gay, in this life.

Are you kidding, pal? I got it, that, you lived your life hiding behind the marriage certificate, bully for you. You have children too, very clever. I imagine, that you think that you are outsmarting everyone who loves you, by having such a great cover. You are not the first nor will you be the last man to do that.

It is interesting that you would want to believe that you were gay in a past life so that you would not admit that you are gay right now, in this life, at this moment. Which makes you an imaginative jughead.

If you continue down that path, it will be alright for a while, I guess, but not for long. Since you are gay, you will make mistakes and will get caught. When your wife finds out, she will probably want to bash your head in. Forewarned is forearmed!

Either stay off the “sauce” or get out, of the proverbial, closet, and live your life the way you want to live it.

So, just to clarify, so that there would be no mistakes about my answer to you, I will explain again.

You are gay. Do not make witless excuses for your needs.

Any man, who wants to be, with another man, is gay. Grow up! Past lives excuse, is for Quixotic dimwits.

Blessings on your past life.

Baba Rumcake

Do You Have a Significant Jerk?

23 Reasons Why You Might Have a Significant Jerk

Below are reasons to dump the jerk in your life. It could be a man or a woman. Don’t be sexist. Just because, it is a jerk, does not mean, just men, it could be a jerk woman; i.e. BITCH. If they do any or a combination of the following things, then today is:

Dump Your Significant Jerk Day!

(for men, please substitute she, thanks)

  • If he mentions how or what you eat; anything about food, dump the jerk.
  • If he ever hit you, dump him.
  • If he intimidates you, dump his ass.
  • If he does not want to meet your parents, dump him.
  • If he does not like ANY of your friends, he is not good.
  • If he does not like you to do anything besides with him, he is controlling.
  • If he hates it when you take up a hobby, he is a jerk.
  • If he is on the phone while ordering his coffee, he is rude and will be to you too in the future.
  • If he does not stand up when he meets your mother or father, he is worthless and disrespectful.
  • If he cannot support himself, get rid of him.
  • If you are the butt of his jokes with people dump him.
  • If he hates it when you warm up against him, he is a jerk.
  • If her spends no time alone with you, he is a jerk.
  • If her does not call when he is going to be late, yep jerk.
  • If he does not cuddle, then he is not a keeper.
  • If he does not kiss you and touch you sometimes, dump the ass.
  • If he watches gay porn he is gay, dump him (for men, maybe you do not want to dump her).
  • If he is texting your girlfriends to go out with them, without your knowledge while trying to be with you, pure jerk.
  • iI he cheats and you accept it, he will do it again; jerk, no surprise there.
  • If he is not reliable, today is the day.
  • If he is not stronger than you physically, (just for women).
  • If you do not feel secure in him, dump him.
  • And finally, if you do not feel safe with him, dump the jerk.

Do you have any other reasons to add to this list? Comments are now open…

The Big D, File or Not File?

Dear Baba Rumcake,
Moved out a year ago. I am paralyzed in trying to make a decision to file. I can’t even use the word. What do I do?
Indecisive in Independence

Dear Indecisive,
If you moved out of the schmuck’s house, I assume, he is not worth keeping. You made the first move now take the next step and set yourself free.

If I don’t wear something for six months, I give it away, throw it out or sell it. A year is a long time, to hang on to something that is way past its use.

Take the proverbial, thumb out of your mouth, and do the thing that needs to be done. No one else will do it for you. Cut the apron strings, cut up rough and get a move on!

There is no cause for waffling here. If you want to go back, do it. If you want to stay out, then file the papers and move on with the next phase of your uncertain life.

Healing will come; after closure.

Blessings on your reluctant self this day. Let me know how you do.

Baba Rumcake

Gorging in Georgia

Dear Baba Rumcake,

I feel ugly and powerless after I ate three slices of pizza, and cried while I did it. I feel gross.

Ever since my husband told me he stopped having sex with me because I stopped seeming to care about my body and looks, I’ve only had some good days.

Most of the time I feel disgusting. I can’t bear to have him watch me eat or walk anymore, because I waddle. Today i wanted to get chips at the store, and i remembered him saying “the last time you went on a diet you came home after day 3 and ate a half of bag of chips at 9 at night all by yourself” and I just started crying silently and havent fully stopped since.

I wish I could get over all these horrible food-related feelings. I know 3 pcs isnt a real binge, and I won’t purge or anything–but i hate how ugly and horrible just thinking about food makes me feel. I wish i had never become this way.

I wish counseling helped more. I wish I could stop defeating myself.

I’m sorry for whining. i’m just so goddamn sad.

Gorging in Georgia

Dear Gorging,
Before I say anything else about your diet, let me just explain that you are married to a douche. I assume that you have been married for a while and most of the time, couples get past the initial looks thing. It seems to me that your precious is still stuck in the dating rut.

As for you, you are not off the hook by any means. Get on it, honey. Close your mouth. An older aunt suggested to me once that all I had to do was “Zip your mouth shut”. Don’t whine, just stop it. Not so easy? Join any number of dieting services, Overeaters Anonymous, Jenny Craig, Weight Watchers, etc. Get on with it, not for that prick of a husband of yours, but for you.

Food is not your enemy, you are. You are spoilt and have too much. You are being irresponsible with blessings that you have been given and taking advance. You have food, be grateful. Then, go from there. If you are healthy, be grateful. If you can eat, be grateful.

What is truly disgusting is not your noshing habits, but wasting money on Counseling, when you can just get on with it. You need a swift kick in the pants to get started down the right road. Counseling for what? What are you getting counseled on? To not eat?

As for that husband of yours, tell him to stuff a pizza in his pie hole.

Blessings, add some whine to your pizza and have a good day.
Baba Rumcake